Elfen Lied

Since I didn’t do the review of a shitty anime for some time ( Pokemon doesn’t count because there I talked about some weird fucked up parts, yet the anime is a cult classic ), this time I’ll talk about one which is one of the most disturbing anime I’ve seen in my life. This is one you probably haven’t heard of yet, but you haven’t missed much, cause this isn’t a masterpiece. Actually I’m wrong, this thing should have an award of it’s own. THE GORIEST ANIME EVER. Why ? We’ll get to that. First of all let’s talk about the plot. The plot on anime-planet is this…

,,For Kouta and Yuka, finding the bloody naked young girl on the beach would change their lives forever, for better or for worse. Unable to speak or function as a normal human being, she is named Nyuu by the duo, and taken into their home in an effort to save her. But what neither teenager knows is that this innocent young girl is actually a killing machine -- an experiment gone terribly wrong -- and it is only a matter of time before the murderer in her awakens again...”. (Source: anime-planet.com)

Now to correct some mistakes. First of all, this girl is not an experiment, but an evolution. And it is not a matter of time before the murderer in her awakens, because it awakens every episode ( although for brief moments ). The title ,,Elfen Lied” didn’t say much at first, only after a little research did I find out it’s meaning. In German, this is translated as ,,Elven song”. Why elven ? Well because the murderous bitch has cat-like ears growing on her head. Ok… but then why elven, elves don’t have such ears. Well I guess ,,Cat song” or ,, Hauskatze Lied” ( that’s cat in German ) sound’s fucked up, so just leave it elfen. And why is it a Lied ? Well because it has a lot of fucked up romance in it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that romance is fucked up, and I welcome it in any anime. I’m just saying that the romance IN THIS anime is fucked up.
The opening theme is some king of Latin song with piano music, and I read that a lied is usually arranged for a single singer and piano. So they got that right, but the video is fucked up. The paintings style is disturbing, it’s like something you show to a insanity ward patient. Also, even though the music is an actual lied, it’s boring, and it tells better than words how boring this thing is. Just listen to it. This opening wraps the whole thing up. Also the opening gives a good example of how much nudity is contained in this anime. At some point I forgot I’m watching an anime and thought this is a hentai, which would actually be more fun and interesting than this.
Also it has A LOT OF GORE. Never in my life have I seen so much blood on the screen and limbs flying which is good is small doses, but they just went way, way too far. Like showing a 6 year old girl cut in half, then her father has his head cut off , all the while the girls brother is watching this. I mean the movie Hostel is a four year old girl licking a lollipop compared to this. It is one of the most notorious anime in the U.S. for it’s graphic violence and nudity. And no amount of editing can tone it down, cause otherwise you have to cut out half of the anime, and that kind of defeats the purpose of making and selling it. I said that they have to cut out half, which contains the violence, if they want to edit it, but want to know what the other half is ? BOREDOM. Plain and simple boredom. When limbs stop flying and blood stop flowing, you see some of the most boring scenes ever, that have no purpose. For example there is a scene of a girl, which later plays a more important part in the episode, walking her dog on a street for like MINUTES. It’s like ,,Yeah you want some action, you want some action, yeah … Well FUCK YOU”. Why ? Why did they put that ? I just want to see her role in this episode, nothing more. Also there are a lot of scenes, which are present only in hentai. Scenes like incest and pedophilia. Scenes like two cousins making out doing French kisses, or a stepfather forcing his stepdaughter to strip in front of him. That’s sick. ,,Hey kids, here are some life lessons, so that you will grow up into good healthy child molesters and cousin-fuckers”.
Plus, even if there is all that bloody violence going on, it gets boring. I mean it’s fun to watch that same character butcher a lot of security guards at first, but that butchering stuff gets a little old, especially since it’s the same character that butchers the fuck out of everyone. It’s like she’s unbeatable, nobody can stop her, and since she is the main character, there is no fun watching her cause she doesn’t build any tension. It’s like you know she’s gonna have no problems with this so you might as well just skip the scene. There are some good battle scenes, but they are few. What this anime needed is less dog walking, more monster fighting. Because the only real fun I had is when killer-bitches like the main character fight each other, cause they all have the same powers.
Also the ending a bit sucks. It shows Kouta making out with Nyuu’s true identity, which killed Kouta’s little sister and father right before his eyes. AND HE KNOWS THAT. Which brings the question. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING ? The bitch killed your family. Don’t you have any feelings about that ? Or do you just want to fuck this girl so much ?
Well… I don’t want to waste my time figuring this shit out. Other aspect are done nicely. The sound and voice-work fell realistic, the character cast is nice and diverse, everyone acts and feels like how he should. But I have a little issue with the graphics. Don’t get me wrong, they are nice, but the character drawings feel a bit childish, like they were meant for a more peaceful anime. I mean they should have been a bit more serious to go along well with all the violence going on.
This anime was a bestseller in the U.S. And maybe rightfully so. Remember, I’m just talking about my issues with it. If you are a fan of gore and mindless massacre, then this one is for you. Otherwise, just look the otherway.